MacOS?

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    Rodney> Let me backup.  What I meant was that ~/.xemacs would be created
    Rodney> as usual and it would be symlinked to ~/Library/Application\
    Rodney>  Support/XEmacs.

Sure, but you need to be sure only one of them is in load-path, not both.
It's trivial to make the symlink, but you probably need to fiddle load-path
as well.  I know from my slight experience with both Carbon XEmacs and X11
XEmacs and such a symlink set up that XEmacs complains mightily when it
finds multiple copies of stuff (autoload definitions as I recall).

    Rodney> So, it is only looking in one place for each.

Right.

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